In a move that caught everyone but discerning readers by surprise, The District today announced it will team its web-only coverage of high school football with web-only coverage of local dog fighting.
"Yeah, we know it doesn't have much to do with the arts or with cosmopolitan-socially-alert-affluent-and-influential-young-adult culture," said Vincent van Bubba, The District's strategic confusion editor. "What's your point?"
Acknowledging that The District's idea of a newsworthy event lately seems to be anything that draws a crowd, van Bubba said District editors are considering several other web-only features:
-- a web-only calendar of local gang jump-ins,
--a web-only column about traffic jams on the 405, and
--web-only round-the-clock coverage of really big holes in the ground -- "but only if our web-only reporters can differentiate them from other naturally occurring features," van Bubba said.
"Of course, our web-only reporters will continue to evoke that special feeling of nostalgia for lost youth among our editors," van Bubba said. "Whether they do it with bland beginner's writing, adolescent angst about building a resume, or just a short skirt -- doesn't matter."
Van Bubba also acknowledged that The District will continue to ignore and trivialize high school sports other than football. "Girls' athletics?" van Bubba said, suppressing a chuckle. "Isn't that an oxymoron?"
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"Yeah, we know it doesn't have much to do with the arts or with cosmopolitan-socially-alert-affluent-and-influential-young-adult culture," said Vincent van Bubba, The District's strategic confusion editor. "What's your point?"
Acknowledging that The District's idea of a newsworthy event lately seems to be anything that draws a crowd, van Bubba said District editors are considering several other web-only features:
-- a web-only calendar of local gang jump-ins,
--a web-only column about traffic jams on the 405, and
--web-only round-the-clock coverage of really big holes in the ground -- "but only if our web-only reporters can differentiate them from other naturally occurring features," van Bubba said.
"Of course, our web-only reporters will continue to evoke that special feeling of nostalgia for lost youth among our editors," van Bubba said. "Whether they do it with bland beginner's writing, adolescent angst about building a resume, or just a short skirt -- doesn't matter."
Van Bubba also acknowledged that The District will continue to ignore and trivialize high school sports other than football. "Girls' athletics?" van Bubba said, suppressing a chuckle. "Isn't that an oxymoron?"